WHO ON EARTH DREAMS THESE UP?
A lexophile of course!
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How does Moses make tea? Hebrews it.
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Venison for dinner again? Oh deer!
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A cartoonist was found dead in his home. Details are sketchy.
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I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.
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Haunted French pancakes give me the crêpes.
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England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.
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I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.
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They told me I had type-A blood, but it was a Typo.
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I changed my iPod's name to Titanic. It's syncing now.
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Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.
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I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid, but he says he can stop any time.
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I stayed up all night to see where the sun went, and then it dawned on me.
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This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met
herbivore.
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When chemists die, they barium.
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I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can't put it down.
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I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.
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Why were the Indians here first? They had reservations.
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I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.
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Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn't
control her pupils?
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When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.
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Broken pencils are pointless.
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What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
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I dropped out of communism class because of lousy Marx.
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All the toilets in New York's police stations have been stolen. The
police have nothing to go on.
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I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.
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Velcro - what a rip off!
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Don’t worry about old age; it doesn’t last.
