A sign in a shoe repair store in Vancouver :
We
will heel you
We will save
your sole
We will even
dye for you.
A sign
over a Gynaecologist's office:
"Dr.
Jones, at your cervix."
In a
Podiatrist's office:
"Time
wounds all heels."
On a
Septic Tank Truck:
Yesterday's
Meals on Wheels.
At an
Optometrist's office:
"If you
don't see what you're looking for...you've come to the right place."
On a
Plumber's truck:
"We
repair what your husband fixed."
On
another Plumber's truck:
"Don't
sleep with a drip. Call your plumber."
At a Tire
Shop in Milwaukee:
"Invite
us to your next blowout."
On an
Electrician's truck:
"Let us
remove your shorts."
In a
Non-smoking Area:
"If we
see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and will take appropriate
action."
On a
Maternity Room door:
"Push.
Push. Push."
At a Car
Dealership:
"The
best way to get back on your feet...miss a carpayment."
Outside a
Muffler Shop:
"No
appointment necessary. We hear you coming."
In a
Veterinarian's waiting room:
"Be
back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"
At the
Electric Company:
"We
would be delighted if you send in your payment on time...However, if you don't,
YOU will be de-lighted."
In a
Restaurant window:
"Don't
stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up."
In the
front yard of
a Funeral Home:
"Drive
carefully. We'll wait."
At a
Propane Filling Station:
"Thank
Heaven for little grills."
In a
Chicago Radiator Shop:
"Best
place in town to take a leak."
