Thursday, January 5, 2023

Notes to Myself

  •  Stop spending money to get free shipping
  •  My coffee is still in the microwave
  •  Don't throw away the box with the instructions away until it's 100% done
  •  Glasses are on the top of your head
  •  Wearing headphones don't make your farts silent
  •  Just because it pops in your head doesn't mean it should come out of your mouth
  •  Don't use your phone as a flashlight to look for your phone
  •  You're never going to remember to do that thing later, do it now

What religion is your bra?

  A man walked into the ladies department and shyly walked up to the woman behind the counter and said, 'I'd like to buy a bra for m...