I LIVE IN PAJAMAS AND DON’T HAVE TO DRESS.
I’M IN ISOLATION , JUST STAYING AT HOME
AND WOULD GIVE MY LAST DOLLAR TO BE FREE TO ROAM
I’M SERIOUSLY AT RISK OR THAT’S WHAT THEY SAY
TELLING ME TO STAY IN AND NOT GO OUT EACH DAY
IN MY HEAD I’M SO YOUNG THOUGH MY LICENCE REVEALS
I’M A 70-PLUS SENIOR (BUT THAT’S NOT HOW IT FEELS!)
WHEN I RUN OUT OF FOOD AND DELIVERIES ARE LATE
I HAVE TO BUY GROCERIES BETWEEN 7 AND 8
SO EARLY IN THE MORNING I HEAD OUT TO RESTOCK
AND DISCOVER A LINE UP THAT WINDS ‘ROUND THE BLOCK
SOCIAL DISTANCING SENIORS ALL 6 FEET APART
MAKE ME WONDER JUST WHEN BECAME AN OLD FART
MY MEALS ARE REPETITIVE (A LOT LIKE MY GAS!)
AND I’M TIRED OF DISCUSSING WHY TRUMP IS AN ASS
MY LATEST NEW OUTFIT IS GLOVES AND A MASK
AND I’M STARTING TO WONDER IF I’M UP TO THIS TASK
I WASH ALL MY GROCERIES ALL FRUIT, MEAT AND VEG.......
WILL THIS ADDITIONAL PRECAUTION TIP ME OVER THE EDGE?
MY BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HAIR HAS WIDE ROOTS OF GREY
NO HAIRDRESSERS AROUND TO HELP WASH THEM AWAY
I’VE BEEN TALKING TO MYSELF NOW I’M ANSWERING BACK
IS IT MONDAY OR FRIDAY I’VE REALLY LOST TRACK
I’VE STOPPED DOING HOUSEWORK, IT’S WEEKS SINCE I’VE DUSTED
AND I KNOW WITHOUT VISITORS, I’LL NEVER GET BUSTED
I FACETIME MY FRIENDS OR WE GROUP CHAT ON ZOOM
AND TRY TO PRETEND WE’RE ALL IN THE SAME ROOM
THANK GOD LIQUOR STORES ARE CONSIDERED ‘ESSENTIAL’
WITHOUT DAILY DRINKS, THIS WOULD DRIVE US ALL MENTAL
EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE IT IS GOOD TO REFLECT
ON WHAT THIS ALL MEANS AND WHAT WE CAN EXPECT
IT’S A TIME TO BE GRATEFUL FOR ALL THAT WE’VE GOT
LIKE A WARM HOUSE AND FOOD THAT OTHERS HAVE NOT
THE BOTTOM LINE HERE BY THE TIME THIS ALL ENDS
IS THAT WE’LL GET THROUGH IT WITH OUR FAMILY AND FRIENDS
SO EVEN IF YOUR PARTNER IS A BIT OF A GRUMP
YOU CAN REALLY BE GRATEFUL, YOU’RE NOT MARRIED TO TRUMP!
Time for some Simon and Garfunkel
