Things

 

I just took a    leaflet out of my mailbox, informing me that I can have sex at  85. I'm so happy because I live at    number   83. So it's not too far to walk home afterward. And it's on the same side of the street. I don't even have to cross the road! ~~~~~ Answering machine  message, "I am not available right now, but thank you for caring enough to call. I am making some changes in my life. Please leave a message after the beep. If I do not return your call, you are one of the changes." ~~~~~ My wife and I had    words, but I didn't get to use mine. ~~~~~ Frustration is trying to    find your glasses without your glasses. ~~~~~ Blessed are those who can    give without remembering and take without forgetting. ~~~~~ The    irony of life is that, by the time you're old enough to know your way around, you're not going anywhere. ~~~~~    God made man before  a woman so as to give him time to think of an answer for her first question. ~~~~~    I was always taught to respect my elders, but it keeps getting harder to find one. ~~~~~ Every    morning is the dawn of a new error. ~~~~~